"It is safe to look within."
My Body Doesn't Work
It hurts, bleeds, aches, oozes, twists, blows up, limps, burns, ages, can't see, can't hear, is rotting away, and so on. Plus what- ever else you may have created. I think I have heard them all.
My Relationships Don't Work
They are smothering, absent, demanding, don't support me, always criticizing me, unloving, never leave me alone, pick on me all the time, don't want to be bothered with me, walk all over me, never listen to me, and so on. Plus whatever else you may have created. Yes, I have heard them all, too.
My Finances Don't Work
They are nonexistent, seldom there, never enough, just out of reach, go out faster than they come in, won't cover the bills, slip through my fingers, and so on. Plus whatever else you may have created. Of course, I have heard them all.
My Life Doesn't Work
I never get to do what I want to do. I can't please anyone. I don't know what I want to do. There is never any time for me. My needs and desires are always left out. I'm only doing this to please them. I am just a doormat. Nobody cares what I want to do. I have no talent. I can't do anything right. All I do is procrasti- nate. Nothing ever works for me, and so on. Plus whatever else you have created for yourself. All these I have heard and more.
Whenever I ask a new client what is going on in his or her life, I usually get one of the above answers. Or maybe several of these answers. They really think they know the problem. But I know these complaints are only outer effects of inner thought pat- terns. Beneath the inner thought patterns is another deeper, more fundamental pattern that is the basis of all the outer effects.
I listen to the words they use as I ask some basic questions:
What is happening in your life?
How is your health?
What do you do for a living?
Do you like your work?
How are your finances?
How is your love life?
How did the last relationship end?
And the relationship before that, how did it end?
Tell me about your childhood, briefly.